Saturday, January 11, 2025
Subscribe
Headlines

LT-Update(End of the Road)

By editor
90
2,832 views

Share

As with all great celebrations and parties, there is always an end. What goes up must always come down.We are glad to inform you that from midnight Zambia time we shall shutdown Lusakatimes, exit this market and cease to exist. It has been a wonderful ride for us and we are glad that we have achieved a lot of the objectives that we set out to accomplish and it is important that we exit while we are still at the top of the game.

We really don’t want to have the Zambia politician syndrome of not leaving the stage when you are at the top of your game. But again who can blame the Zambian politician really, after all politics in Zambia is one of the best pension schemes for those that didn’t bother about taking care of their future. Gratuity is paid out consistently. Loans for luxury cars are readily available. So very understandable why our colleagues can prolong their stay on the stage. Even when they are fired, all they do is change parties , attack their former parties and hope to ride on the wave of another dependable pension scheme with their new found home…. Anyway we are getting distracted. This update is about LT closing down and lets focus on some of the objectives we achieved.

First, our objective was to populate the web with Zambian content. Today you can search the internet for some obscure place in Zambia and some obscure politician and chances are that you will get a substantial number of references linked to lusakatimes. We have also pumped links for most Zambia posts in to social media like Tweeter, though we wished we had done more with facebook. The same can be said for images as well, we have pumped more images about Zambia and if you search for a picture on Zambia again you are bound to get a reference connected to lusakatimes.

Secondly, we feel we have managed to influence the delivery free news on the internet. Today Zambians can roam the web and read news for free everywhere they go. Even some budding entrepreneurs who thought they could set up web sites and charge Zambians for breaking news, and become millionaires in six months, got a rude awakening when they found the elephant in the internet room called lusakatimes giving free news. Thankfully they also resorted to free news. We are glad we did this for the internet citizens of Zambia.

Thirdly, we raised the standard of delivering content to a whole new level. Sites never bothered to take live feedback from their readers and the designs where of low standard and since LT entered the frail there has been a wake up call to the major online papers to raise the bar. The Post Newspaper now allows comments and you can now debate on their stories and we are glad to report that ZNBC,ZANIS, Zambia Daily Mail and Times of Zambia, have hired the best geeks money can buy in Zambia to design their websites in such a way that they have the exact features as lusaktimes, if not more. Pause,by the way, thanks for taking time off your busy schedule to read this far without rushing to comment. We have noticed a tendency of a lot of our readers who just read the headline, first paragraph and last paragraph, and then rash to comment without reading the entire story. Since you have come this far, we guess you wont be fooled. This whole post has just been an April fools prank, happy April fools day- whatever that means. Thank you for your support to lusakatimes and for making it what it is today. We owe it to you and we are still around! Have a great and fabulous day. Oh, by the way, you can read the last paragraph if you want to, just for entertaiment.

Certainly, you can see why we feel that we don’t need to exist because all that we do will be duplicated by the sources we cut and paste from. It’s time to move on to what we are good at. But before we do that lets talk about some of the things we have failed during the course of our existence. We certainly failed to shake off the tag of shushushu in some people’s minds. Are you shushushus? This unconstitutional question kept popping up in our inbox. It is really an unconstitutional question because there is really no right answer to it. If we say yes we are, you wont believe us because a shushushu is not supposed to admit s/he is one. If we say we are not, again you wont believe us because a shushushu will never admit s/he is one. What came first, Chicken or Egg?

editor
editorhttp://www.lusakatimes.com

90 COMMENTS

  3. :(( :((:((:(( come on LT you are the bread and butter of my news.don’t leave – Fred Membe will start charging us again.and obviously the govt papers will censor our comments bad if and when they ever allow us to comment.:((:((:((:((

  7. You got me there LT ….. ..:d/….I believed it…..Well at least i’ll be more alert for the rest of the day . No one is gonna pull the wool over my eyes now.
    ……..BTW Funny comments ’bout our politicians .

  8. You got me there LT ….. ..:d/….I believed it…..Well at least i’ll be more alert for the rest of the day . No one is gonna pull the wool over my eyes now.
    ……..BTW Funny comments ’bout our politicians .

  10. LT you almost killed me with BP. I was so worried and was relieved when I read that it was a joke. Continue with your good works. Last Paragraph – I hope you are not shushushu. We don’t want to be investigated because of our comments especially when we intend to challenge RB 60 years from now.

  11. LT, I almost said bad things, but I checked my calendar and I just laughed at myself! Good one!!!!!

  12. oH SHIT ! I WISH IT WAS TRUE. . . .YOU GUYS LOST IT. YOU HAVE FAILED TO CONTROL ROGUE ELEMENTS WHO JUST YAP YAP… ACCEPT THE OFFER $$$ AND DO THE HONORABLE THING …. PLUG OFF.

  14. Good one LT, you quite succeeded with the prank and I had something happening to my blood flow, except that I read on.

  19. Someone from LT answer me please. I hope I am wrong but when you say and I quote:

    If we say yes we are, you wont believe us because a shushushu is not supposed to admit s/he is one. If we say we are not, again you wont believe us because a shushushu will never admit s/he is one.

    I feel it should have been if we said….. you wouldn`t have believed us and blah blah blah. The picture should have been that in the past.

    Hilarious though. What a prank. Very well thought through. One wishes our politicians could have just a third of this imagination.

  21. :((:((:((, You almost made me sink in my seat. For those of us in the diaspora (UK), LT has been a source of information and interaction with many Zambians through live commentary on various issues. I wish this paper more life. Thanks for freaking me out, if i had not read the whole comment, i would have started to bring out my vernom of how Zambian media is being victimised. Anyway long live LT

  24. Owe, you are testing the ground. You know you sold this site to the MMD so you are looking a ways to quit. No one will miss you. Just go. Don’t use First April as an excuse. When people start prasing themslves, then we know something is seriuosly wrong. Anyway, we are watching

  25. IF YOU REALLY WANTED TO SHUT DOWN I WAS GOING TO MAKE SURE YOU SHUT DOWN BEFORE MIDNIGHT. THEN YOU ADVERTISERS (YOUR SOURCE OF INCOME WHO ADVERTISE BECAUSE WE BLOG) WOULD BE ON YOU WITH INJUNCTIONS FOR BREACH OF CONTRACT (CLOSING EARLIER THAN YOU HAD WARNED). THEY WOULD DEMAND THAT YOU REMAIN OPEN UNTIL THE COURTS DECIDE AND YOU WOULD BE FORCED TO RE-OPEN BEFORE YOUR MIDNIGHT. FOR THE LITTLE WHILE YOU REMAIN OPEN WE WOULD FIND ALTERNATIVES AND MAKE SURE YOU NEVER EVER RE-OPEN AGAIN EVEN UNDER A DIFFERENT NAME. SEE, LT YOU WOULD NOT BE THE ONLY ONE WITH A STRATEGY. THANK GOD IT IS ONLY AN APRIL FOOLS DAY PRANK BUT MIND WHAT YOU WISH FOR. ENJOY RESPONSBLY

  26. Dear Honchos,

    This is all classic. You have beaten the lazy punditry that that does not read it all but swing on commentry.The Shushushu tag we all carry it when we challenge fantasy.Losers are of the view that critical rational thinking is only synonymous with Shushushu and the those in the Diplomatic Corp. You andd us laugh over it daily when they say i Post from DC where i serve as a Diplomat. That is what laziness can do. Anything America is DC based.Look at my distance from DC they keep fluffing about and the server i use then you realise that we are dealing with handcapped opponents too unsophisticated for serious battles.

    Thumbs up!

  27. Phew! LT that wasn’t funny don’t do it again. It was going to be more fun if you pranked tht Shikapwasha and Kunda have been fired. Anyway you got me too.

  28. I quote ‘Even some budding entrepreneurs who thought they could set up web sites and charge Zambians for breaking news, and become millionaires in six months, got a rude awakening when they found the elephant in the internet room called lusakatimes giving free news. Thankfully they also resorted to free news” HERE LUSAK TIMES YOU HAVE EXPRESSED YOUR REAL FEAR. IT’S CLEAR TO SEE THAT YOU ARE VERY AFRAID OF WHOEVER YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT HERE.

  31. This is all classic and challenging the mindset.Keep e’m coming LT. Steadfastly leading with others following.

  32. Oh please LT. do you expect anyone to read the whole stories on your site when we would have already read from the sources, Daily mail and times? Or do you think we do not know their websites? We only come here to insult leaders and that is all. We don’t get news from here. There is no news here only repetitions. Please, stop praising yourselves for stealing people’s news.

  34. Fwaka ba Lt ! Ha ha ha you got me fooled really.At first i had a feeling of dissapointment and disbelief which later turned into some nice morning laughter upon realising that it was a joke.:-?

  37. hahaha… you got me there! For a moment I almost believed your first paragraph till I got to the 5ht. Aha! now am calm but laughing at myself lolest!
    Nice one, we love you & thanx for the good works (congrats). Happy Easter everyone, with Christ’s love.
    :)>-

  38. Ba LT haha! I was even going to offer you money to stay online. You have really provided a much-needed service and woken up the others, exactly as you have said. But we are curious still about who you are, we don’t mind if you are shushushus becos we know they are all PF anyway.

    Well done mysterious LT/Batman!

  39. its ok…we dont need you anymore, we will come up with our own blogging site, no modaration. People will be free to express their views in any language, tone etc:d/

  40. You are simply the best,you offered me and many others to talk back to politicians and debate among ourselves for mahala(free) please do not even think of Fred Mmeembe buying you off with his billons.

  41. Well done LT. I nearly believed you. You are doing good work informing us what is going on in our country and we are able to comment.

  43. Hey its April fools day my daughter fooled me early morning today before leaving for school she told me there was a geko in my bedroom as she knows i fear geko so much. So Ba LT just as a started reading i knew it was just fooling us. Good fools day though.

  44. A man escapes from a prison and breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside, he finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair. While tying the homeowner’s wife to the bed, the convict gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.
    While he’s in there, the husband whispers over to his wife: “Listen, this guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He’s probably spent a lot of time in jail and hasn’t seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don’t resist, don’t complain… do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is obviously very dangerous. If he gets angry, he’ll kill us both. Be strong, honey. I love you!”
    His wife…

  45. ….responds: “He wasn’t kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me that he’s gay, thinks you’re cute, and asked if we had any Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. I love you, too!”

  48. Goodness grace! LT really had me fooled for a second. I felt quite strange (dizzy) reading the farewell lines… but thank God it’s 1st April. I hope you will stick around for longer days…

  50. If this iz your way of doing “April 1, Foolz Day” withe people, then you have got it all wrong about the real meaning.

  51. in as much as i agree with lusaka itmes .i also disagree.first we like this space because it is the only place u can electnonically put ur views.however the contents of discussions are narrow and mostly political.secondly internet in zambia is like owning a car it is expensive .so your readers/bloggers are largely in diaspora .they wiil be no vacuum created to a guy.lady based in zambia if u were to close.in this respect u are a giant to me outside zambia and not in zambia.that notwithstanding i want to thank you for encouraging freedom of expression.it one thing kaunda withheld and one can safely assume zambia would have been different today if kk had only allowed amaisosele.

  53. Firing subliminal shots to Postzambia lsktimes? I remember their get rich quick scheme to charge diasporians a lot just for zed news

  54. I’m reliably told that LT is being closed down because it has links to the ShuShuShu. The stories from the people (us people) contributing has been critical to the MMD and NyamaSoya. hence they have abandoned this chatter page. Guys with enough IT mascle & intellect, take up this LT or design another web page. Lets not give up!!. Lets continue to have this page revamped, we are going to elections. No one shouls silence us. LT bloggers mostly has been very critical and up to date in shooting the MMD. Hence the desire by MMD to close it. No matter what they tried to do, we kept coming at MMD. They failed to divert our attention to Sata or HH, we kept regrouping and shooting them down. LT whats my award????

  58. It would really be sad for you guys to close however allow me to equally point out that you no longer have juicy, saucy and really investigative stories anymore, i somewhat find you site boring, because afterall i will read the same stories from Times, daily, ZNBC etc quoting the same ZANIS journalist. Come on guys in as much as i nid to support you, its actually prudent to tell you these facts, right in front of your face…… Your past performance has surely not been inspiring to say the least. And i know other bloggers would condemn me…but its the truth, im just trying to be objective. Just as i laugh at politicians who support the POST even when they re at the wrong side of the argument, Say “Mmembe ur wrong on this one but i love ur paper” objectvty guys LT pliz CHANGE OR DIE…

  59. It would really be sad for you guys to close however allow me to equally point out that you no longer have juicy, saucy and really investigative stories anymore, i somewhat find you site boring, because afterall i will read the same stories from Times, daily, ZNBC etc quoting the same ZANIS journalist. Come on guys in as much as i nid to support you, its actually prudent to tell you these facts, right in front of your face… Your past performance has surely not been inspiring to say the least. And i know other bloggers would condemn me…but its the truth, im just trying to be objective. Just as i laugh at politicians who support the POST even when they re at the wrong side of the argument, Say “Mmembe ur wrong on this one but i love ur paper” objectvty guys LT pliz CHANGE OR DIE…CL

  60. sadness engulfs me but then, so does every other politician’s big nose. bring back the 80s when there was proper regulation of the media. some chap’s been fired at ZNBC for showing pornography on national TV.

  62. Wishing you all the best ‘Ladies & Gentlemen at Lusaka Times…I did enjoy reading your paper. Adios!

  63. Interesting but I dont like being fooled.

    Anyhow, take care and I like your “What came first, Chicken or Egg? ” conclusion which means that being shushushus is part of life.
    _
    Matt 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all thee things shall be added unto you.

  64. Had me the best if all, had me sending prayers for all my people on LT. That’s good though for the prayer was from the heart. lol.

  66. Pipo, its fools day and these guyz are going nowhere.This site is going to be available even many years to come.

  70. Okay, thank you for the prank and your sense of humour.

    Here’s food for thought: In 1957, a BBC radio commentator announced that a “spaghetti tree” had been discovered somewhere in Italy. The elite of that era, who were the only ones wealthy enough to afford a radio, were convinced that the spaghetti tree really exists and wanted to know “how they could grow their own”. The then prime minister was not amused by this prank and threw his b.u.t.t. in jail were he languished till 1985 :d . Happy Fool’s day, y’all:)>-**==**==**==

  72. This exposes the reading culture that we have. LT, this is a goog research on the reading culture on the bloggers. Fellows, the cure for HIV/AIDS is explained in a 134,675,489 paged pumphlet. With the prevailing syndrom, I don’t think we will know in. We were not FOOLs but eventurelly, we embrence the attitude of being fool. Good one LT

  73. LT……you got me :((:((:((:(( for a minute there and then i remenbered what day it was…..good prank..very good prank. you are so not going anywhere…..i have you bookmarked on my google chrome and you are the highlight of my day. The POST, ZNBC, ZANIS etc can have live feeds and all that but there can only be one LT….:x

  75. Well if you shut down we say bon voyage, if yours was a fools day prank you should have stopped your article at ‘gotcha’.

    If you are shushu well it too is a job that pays and maybe you have met your masters assignment for you whichever way Enjoy the Good Friday pickings and not ‘njikata’ take time to go and ask for attonment especially if you are a spy.

  77. good riddance to bad rubbish! same goes for the movement of mandrax dealers in 2011….kuya bebele…MMD zwaaaa…..

  79. A GOOD SHOT AT OUR NERVES. Happy fools day to all politicians and their blind supporters. my hope for you is ,the next general elections should be on FOOLS DAY 2011.You have fooled us for too long.

  85. LOL i have to admit it has been the best April Fools Day so far on my part especailly that no one really dares to push their jokes far especially that I am at work. It was becoming suspicious when you said Daily mail and times have hired geeks to update their sites 🙂 Good one LT, we thank you for the news!!!

  86. Nice one LT, you had me going there for a second! Keep doing what you’re doing…for free, well done:)>-

    Now off you go in search of breaking news. Can we have some pictures of indepence stadium by the way?

  87. LT should shut down for good. infarct they should donate their computers to community schools. there is no need for LT to be publishing news which can also be found on post.com and znbc.mmd…

    surely, LT are doing very bad. their quality of news sources is always unclear. they don’t even get paid to put up news for few people. why should they continue? it is not economical for them to continue. only few people access this website. in other countries, this site can not be accessed

    LT are also known to be using mobile phones as savers. surely, there is a good way to publish websites…….. what they need is some MMD top guys to invest in the all thing, other wise, i am so happy to see Lt going

    April fools day attack…..

  89. Yah, good one LT!

    I almost peed in my pants thinking about reverting back to the Daily & Times of Zambia for news. LOL, April fool’s day—-for completeness sake, I read them all!!!!

  90. L.T. You almost got the trough. But you have handed it back to me. But I will give it back to you since you have promised to stay. Hey I read with keen interest only to discover that you were up to fool me. Any way, you almost got me off guard but “LOl” I have got you. Keep it up guys. You are creating while others are imitating.

Comments are closed.

Read more

Local News

Company

Trending

Categories

© Lusaka Times

Discover more from Lusaka Times-Zambia's Leading Online News Site - LusakaTimes.com

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading