A couple in Luanshya is alleged to be organising marriage between its 22 year old daughter and a 29 year old man whom she doesn’t love.
Pascal Mwape and his wife Mary, are allegedly threatening to chase their daughter out of the house if she refuses to marry the said man identified as Francis of the same township.
The victim, daughter to the couple, Flaviour Mwape, told ZANIS in an interview that her mother verbally threatened to chase her out of the house on Tuesday morning should she refuse to marry the said man.
Ms. Mwape explained that she already had a boyfriend whom she loves and has been dating for over four years now.
She says he is the man she prefers to marry.
Ms. Mwape attributes her parents’ hatred for her lover to tribalism, saying her parents prefer a fellow Bemba to marry her.
But when contacted for a comment, her lover who only identified himself as Michael, based in Lusaka, confirmed that Flavor’s mother threatened him on Monday.
He added that his fiancee’s mother threatened him when she called him on her mobile saying she will not accept his lobola because Flaviour will be married off to her preferred man.
Michael explained that he wants his girlfriend to go to College first before marrying her, adding that he is disappointed with his girlfriend’s parents.
He has since appealed to relevant organisations on human and women’s rights to come on board and help him save her girlfriend from what he dubs ‘Selfish parents’ motives’ to force his girlfriend into marriage against her consent.
[ ZANIS ]
Thats tradition. Period
Girl needs to go to school and gain skills so that she can become independent. These parents are living in the stone-age!
#1
What do you mean tradition? If tribalism is a tradition,then good luck on its sustainability cos nowadays inter-tribal marriages are widespread and major ingredients of real LOVE like intimacy,proximity,passion and indeed commitment know no tradition.
Ba Mwape!!!! Filishani kanshi? Mwatusebanya shikulu! Limbi mwalilya kale lobola behind you daughter. How did you marry your wife ba Mary? And you #1, what tradition are you talking about. We have human rights now. Come on!
The legal definition of marriage in Zambia is the voluntary union of a man and woman at the exclusion of all others. Others in this case also includes Flaviour Mwape’s parents . They have no say as to whom their daughter should get married to.
In Zambia it is a biological man and a biological woman. Those advocating for gay and lesbian marriages should start by changing the Laws of Zambia. Let us not spend time talking about things that are none value adding, like gay and lesbian, we have alot of problems in this country.
#1 doesn’t know anything about tradition. Its all nonsense stone age crap which has no place in our society.
Ba Michael just marry the girl instead of hiding in the pretence of wanting the girl to go to School. 4 years mungonama mwana wabene. Thats why ma parents bakalipa. They’ve seen ati muli ba boza. Take her to college whist she is in your home. Nibambili bana chita so.
#7 spot on. My wife was going to college for her diploma from my home. She’s gone on top have a degree now. So ba Micheal, give us another reason for your 4 yrs of courtship!
# 8. My wife too went to college from my home and is now thinking of pursuing her degree.
Tradition my foot!
NDEMUCHENDE is right.Girl there is nothing like real love.Love is a Feeling to Be Learned not to be found.Accept and get married to this guy(Hope he is not a satanist) or else you will loose alot.
Love brewed in the African pot.
Parents role is to guide their children on the qualities that they should look for in a man or woman not to impose someone against ones will. Let Children choose for themselves whom they want to marry. If the Luanshya couple are not willing to let their daughter get married to her current boyfriend because of certain serious reasons that they know about, then they should clearly state the reasons and advise her to choose another one on her own. If she still wants the man even after disclosing the reason behind their disapproval, then let them release her at her on peril. I am aware of someone who was HIV negative marry an HIV positive person against parental advise and they have since died both wife and husband.
Dear parents, your preferred candidate has been rejected by the electrorate (your daughter).If you force your daughter, that may end up not be a happy home. Whatever happens she will blame you and morever a lot cud ve happened between her and the Ba Michael. Ba Michael own up now not after college as others ve observed.
Poverty and desperation can lead to immoral behaviour, forced marriage has no room report the greedy couple to relevant authority,
this is a stupid story that should not have made it to this foru, are we talking about minors here, ukutumpa!
Bamukobekela ten wala
What is her phone number , i want to put my bid on her.
Just as many had attributed, Micheal the best is to marry and see her to school whilest she is in your Home bro. We are doing the same. In the first place, you met her and her education. You start moulding her when she is with you period.
atate nakana chimubaba sinifuna chimubabe ngati munadya ndalama bwezani nakana sinifuna chibabe,musiyeni mwana azifunile eka chikondi.mr micheal four years too long ma brother take her or lose her the choice is yours.
We all marry strangers. That’s why there is divorce.
One day you wake up and you find you are married to D. Siliya then your scream is heard all over Lusaka..MOOOOOOOOOOOONDO
On a serious note. This is a 22 year old woman, an adult whom in regular circumstances should be at college or earning a living on her own not depending on her parents.
Who wants to be supporting a 22 year old.
Flavior should take the ‘grow up pill’ and curve out her own decisions in life. Her so called boyfriend has been milking the cow for free for 4 years why should he purchase it?
This 22 year old should the guy who is in luansha than this other who isi Lsk. She does not even know what he is doing in Lsk.
I had a girl friend too but I used to cheat her everytime I went off town. And almost all we men are like that. So you g girl my advise is marry the new guy and forget this boy for 4 years He has been having sex with you without marrying you. Get on track and get a man who I am sureloves you. Stupid girl.
ukutemwa icuma ukoo!!! ba guy nabo abo bale fwayaila ukupa teti balande ati nakana gelo mwatusebanya naimwe ba mwape.
I think there is more to this story than just tribalism. The problem is Michael. One can only infer that the parents have worked out that Michael is just a player, who has no intention of making an honest woman of their daughter. On the other hand, Francis is a respectable gentleman, who will give their daughter some kind of future. The daughter is clearly not serious about going to college. She is 22, what has she been doing?
This young lady is an adult who should leave the parents’s house and start supporting herself. You’ve been dating for 4 years and still cannot make a decision as when you will marry. Ukushishita.
Also, this Michael chap should immediately take her out of the parents care and put her in college if he wants to marry her in 4 years time. The young lady’s parents should not be carrying the burden on his behalf.
I think sometimes parents are right and they want the best for their children,am saying this from ma own experience i married the guy against my parents wish ,i married the man i loved and today i live to regret for the rest of ma life back to square one .so advise to flavor examined the man very well he might be mr right.
Bakaika 10 Kwacha e, Ba sumina ndefwayo kulilapo, banyina bakana awe alimwaiche.I cant comment because these individual and personal matters best left to the families and relatives to resolve.
Guys, who amongst yourselves was independent at 22years old? These parents are just not serious. They want kangono instead of taking the girl to university.
I was independent at 22years.
I don’t think that taking sides in favor of one man or the other is going to help here, as none of us know the people in question or the specific circumstances. I don’t understand why this woman went to the news; what was she hoping to gain? #13 Truthseeker, but did the HIV negative partner know going in that it was a discordant status relationship? And, were they happy together, did they enjoy their time with each other? No one wants to die young, but I don’t see someone’s status as a dealbreaker if we’re compatible in other ways. And what about condoms?
Chitapankwa, i think there is more to the story than tribalism but whatever the case i dont think the parents are justified in forcing a mate on their daughter. If she chooses a player or a pauper, they can make their feelings known but they cant do anything about it, they just have to live with it, period! Thats the modern Zambia