By Dr Charles Ngoma
‘Allow the little children to come to Me, do not hinder them, for to such like these, belongs the Kingdom of Heaven.’ Jesus Christ. There is no doubt that children have a special place in the heart of God. Elsewhere in the Bible, the Apostle urges fathers not to ‘frustrate their children.’
Zambia, declared a ‘Christian nation’ should be at the forefront in protecting these vulnerable members of our society from all harm. Sometime ago, I wrote about the fundamental duties of the State and inter alia, is the protection of the vulnerable in society. I am amazed that the issue of consensual sex between people of the same gender rouses so much interest and anger from the great majority of Zambians, and yet when children, without their consent are abused, the horrible practice is met with silence among family members and the victim is left to nurse the trauma and scars for the rest of their lives all alone. Putting the ‘Christian nation’ tag aside, Zambia as a signatory to the Convention on the rights of the child, must protect the rights of children.
The question that must first be answered is ‘who is a child?’ It is well known that our modern idea of a child differs from that of our fore fathers who were ready to marry off their daughters as soon as they attained ‘chisungu.’ The UN convention defines a child as any person under the age of 18 years. There in lies the difficulty. Our cultural psyche on one hand treats even young male adults like children, by continuing to look after them in their parents’ or guardians’ homes while at the same time, allowing the females to be married off even as early as 13 years of age. Our problem is further compounded by the existence of State and Customary law simultaneously. I am not concerned here, however, with what is accepted culturally, but what is not.
There are however, thousands of people in Zambia who have been forced to have sex with adults or older children in their own homes. A child seeks love and attention, but there are people who take advantage of these children and force them in these indecent activities. Most of the time, the culprit is an older male relative and the victim a girl. I do not have any evidence of boys being molested sexually but I presume it does happen. The girl-child is most likely to be a victim when they have been orphaned. The orphaned may become sex slaves of the guardian in order to receive education. I have no statistical data to prove this but the few that I have come across have been molested by relatives and by fathers. What is most disconcerting is that in some situations the wife of the man knows about what is going on but elects to keep quiet.
Psychologists tell us that children who are exposed to forced sex at young age grow up to be promiscuous. Such girls also lose their self worth so that in adulthood, they either become manipulative, using their bodies to get what they want or become so untrusting that they cannot stay with one partner. The abused goes on to abuse others as well and the cycle goes on. Street prostitution is often blamed on the economy, but why is it that of the millions of poor people, it is just a proprtion of them who find selling their bodies a worthy source of income? The answer may lie in what happened ‘at home.’
Next is beating. This may sound controversial and there will be several Christians who will quote me the Bible here, but I will say it nonetheless. Beating a child is wrong. I am not talking about a smack on the bottom or back of the hand. Even if you use a ‘whip’ or a ‘belt’ or a ‘stick’, it takes only one stripe to cause pain. If it is pain you want the child to feel, why go on and an and on? You go on and on, because you are angry and you are essentially venting your anger on the child. That is not discipline it is fighting, it is not training, it is assault. So many of our children have even been maimed and grievously wounded because of this. I have had the misfortune of treating children in Zambian hospitals who have been brought with injuries that were obviously non-accidental. I have seen children with burns on their inner thighs branded by hot pressing irons, but the accompanying adults give a different story. Children who are not reasoned with as they grow up, will also learn to use brute force to get their way. Is there any wonder why we have street brawls, public place fights and even electoral violence? I can already sense that when this article is published, there will be a few who will fail to use any simile of civility but will vent their anger with unprintables. If I had been in their geography they would not hesitate to lay hands on me.
Then there is just neglect. So many Zambian children baby sit their siblings long before they have ceased to be children themselves. The malnutrition that infants suffer is not always due to lack of food but in some cases may be emotional. The parent or guardian fails to provide the care and attention that he child needs and abandons them to someone else from morn till eve. The child refuses to eat and as time goes by, he becomes malnourished. Others are given daily household chores that are way ahead for their age and for that reason, kept away from school altogether or if they do go to school, find themselves too tired to study after school. Thus, these children are locked up in the dark world of illiteracy and poverty.
Let me apply myself to the conscience of every Zambian. As a nation we have no space in our psyche for same sex unions which we condemn left, right and centre. Surely, is that so much of an evil that the gay people deserve to be punished by a custodial sentence or even death (as many in Uganda advocated?) Methinks, the sexual and physical abuse of children, children who did not chose to come into this world, did not choose the parents, did not choose their homes and CANNOT in any way legally, morally or ethically consent to what adults do to them, is a worse crime. I am surprised that though we have appended our national signature to the convention on the rights of children, we have no laws that really protect children or if we have, there seems to be no political will to enforce them. I would suggest that there be appointed a Commissioner for Children with powers equivalent to those of the Anti-corruption Commissioner to prosecute the culprits who are destroying these young lives for to such as these, belongs the future existence of our country.
